Another Sexless And Sleepless night

Well This was an night We stayed up for awhile talking me and My girl Waiting on the kids to pass out. Before they did we went up stairs and laid on the bed relaxing. I told her I would be right back be naked or atleast half naked when I come back. I went down stairs and came back up she still clothed..That's Alright So I lay with her and We end up talking she telling me How I made her sick and That she is not having sex with me Cause she doesn't Feel good So I shrug it off and let it go figuring whatever nothing new right? I end up coming back down stairs and making the kids follow cause she was sick and I wwanted her to get some sleep. .

I got up on yahoo again and started speaking to the one bbw blonde white female we were just chatting I made a few passes at her she said if I was single . She wants to be me and jamies friend. So I told her She was cool and I told her all our problems and my problems in this relationship she had no good advice cause she really could not help. My girl has been like this as long has I been with her. She then asked if I asked my Girl about a 3 some. I should say the bbw blonde on yahoo is BI and I told her on the real My girl is not like that she thinks it's nasty So that sucks..Cause IF I could have smashed in to the Blondes Pussy and ass and made her suck my dick I would have She said she wished she could help me out I told her I wish She could too. but it was ok. Anyway after all the talk and Her trying to give advice we said our good byes good nights sweet dreams shit.

I finally went up to bed but I could not sleep..I just couldn't so I went back down stiars and took out the trash cleaned the corner of the kitchen Sweept the living room. Thought about things..Made cereal and here I am now.. I think After this. I'll go shave I feel the hair on me growing and I need to get rid of it lol..Well that's it for now

I dunno what to call this.

Alright I have come to an conclusion about somehting I am Denying m GF as much as she is denying me I mean ok..I know she loves me and I love her But I think aside from the same ole same ole shit I am tired of. (like the same Rutine we do everyday and all the time) I think cause we are into different things. Or atleast she is not into what I am Then I do the same to her and deny her of things she wanna do ok like Lets start with sexual. I am into Gothic looking things. I wore nail polish before..That was it really Those black braclets and Spiked bands and shit like that. She like my ex thinks that's some freak shit and by freak she means like..Different shit she is not into . And Because I am black i should not be wearing shit like that. When did my race make for things i should and could wear? Then there is little things like movies she wants to watch straight up Horror I love horror and thrillers and shit but not like that. I want to watch other shit I wanna Share other shit with her One movie I watched alone would have loved to watch with her. but she said she is not into that kind of movie. It was the Curious Case of Benjahmen Button . But no no that kind of shit is not for her. So is it me or what we just different as all hell? I know people say some times Differences mix or some shit like that but.. I think in this case no. Okay that is just some normal shit off the top of my head.

Sexual shit..she has not denied me fucking any hole she has but she will fight for her ass not to be touched. She wont swallow...That's alright really..And she do not really suck dick at all and in this I have stoped eating pussy.. but I know if the female I am fucking has a nice pussy i will eat her out. I know from the other females I fucked I will with out a doubt. . Anyway her main thing is me to come in her pussy breed her knock her up and shit. That puts me in the hole for another fucking kid. And that means another Year or something I am forced with her..Am I right? And I know I say it like I do not wanna be here or being here is the worst thing ever. It is not really but BUT I think if we were not together there be better for us out there I know what I want in life she wants nothing to do with that kinda shit. and I know what she wants and I am not willing to give it. (Mainly if I have to stay) . And Yes I have tried talking to her she doesn't wanna hear her so there. lol..This is why I continue to just do what It is I do..I wont say I am not happy but I am not slap happy..I am ok with what I got I just know I can have much more and so could she .

I think of this if you were a female and You had the same run of the mill life with your BF and just did the same shit everyday Why would you wanna stay with him? Yeah you love him but...Is he boring you? Are you boring him. You rarely cook for him...When you wash clothes it is mainly the shit load of childrens clothes you brought of craigs list or something. never his shit and sometimes your shit. You pretty much leave him to dress like a bum and your self at times Yes your kids dress alright. but your man got fucked up gear leading him to wash his own shit all the time he cooks mainly and washes dishes cause you wont and you say you can't. All you two do is take care of the kids you got. You two never have time for each other with all the kids he is shooting into you and you wont use birth control nor will he use the male version of it(Fuck no i wont) ...Anyway Tell me how the hell is she happy? And Some where deep inside of her I know she gotta be feeling like I feel.

Asian Females

Ok This is more like a Want a Fantasy of Mine. I love ..Asian females And I have ever since I dunno when. I remember Far back my Dad brought home Japanese anime And I was so into it. Dirty Pair and Outlanders and Bubblegum Crisis Were the First animes I ever seenin my life. And I would Always Dream about bein apart of the Bubblegum Crisis Team With these Asian Women and Me being the Black guy Dating one of them. I always loved the Language The sound of it. I would always have to watch my Animes in Japanese with English Subs MAde me love the people even more.

Then as I grew Up I started watching old school Karate Vids I found most of them were all Chinese Jackie Chan, Jet Li, Bruce Lee, Al Chinese and seemed to love there culture half if not all there movies were based on tales of the History or just scened in China I loved the olden way they lived it seemed so simple and Easy like everyone had a place and played there roles Right. It seemed to have Order That was fun..not like order that was forced though Most of the films invoilved that Force happening.

Anime I came to find was Japanese So It hought that was really Cool Japan as Anime China as Real movies.Anyway As I said I love the way they speak and though I am into big females I love and lust BBW's So much it is unreal. I would love to be with a Asian female Whether Chinese or Japanese. Not because of there history mainly because of who they are small females thin long beautiful hair I love there HAIR >.< lol It is so hot.

Craigs List Shit

Ok I am on Crais list reading abunch of add. Cause you know I am looking for some pussy lol Anyway I come a across Bbw Post I read it see the pictures and Mmm Mmm I message her but I get a Mailer Demon saying she has not gotten my mail so i mail her a few times Then she finally gets my shit we talked like..Well hardly..But I am going to hang in there See if I can get some of that ass. I mean look at it she got some nice tits too. So I shall see how things Go and Hopefully I come back here with more pix of her and what we did together.

Thus far I got like..2 Females I just met off Craigs List one is Older like almost 40 and has a man but she said we can still have fun. The other is 40 and looking for more of a real thing...I can't promise that I mean I got a famil and My GIrl I might Fuck someone else but I would never give her up. So I guess i shall say something about that when I get to it Now this other Female near 40 I am hoping to be able to bring my Camera to that one and I would love to post them up on my flickr and here too maybe. I do not have a great fan base here so Far one girl and A Guy..Who maybe hjust said somethign that one time and one time only. Who knows.

Continue~~~~~

Next was the whole thing about babies how I want them I do not I want them with females I do not have to be with in long term Or maybe with a female who has an open relation or hell a slave type one or the other I suppose...I dunno. Anyway a Family member Came here Unexpected and she fliped on me like it was my fault When I had no clue I hate having Visitors frankly So why would I know this?.

This weeks..Shit

This week was most interesting . Or this month I sshould say really. We made up and all that good jazz things were going pretty good. like Sex and All these other things it was so good not the best but good enough. Anyway things that happen were kinda forgotten that is all good but you need to remember She is a Crazy ass Psycho-Bitch Who flips off at anything for anything no matter if it has to do with her or not. The things I speak on shall sound weird and stupid all around might make you laugh abit.



The one time we got into an argument was about a post on myspace. This Hawt girl was wearing like this...Sexy skimpy outfit so what I did was post a comment. Saying I wish my girl would wear something like that.. I was upstairs working out on my weight bench and here she comes talking about I saw that shit you posted on myspace At first I was more then puzzled. Then she explained what she meant .I laughed about it but she was upset about it.

The next thing. My cousin who is not really related to me. by blood was talking to my mom about chilling with me and so on. Now rumors are going on that he is cheating on his wife. I do not know if it is true or not I do not care frankly .Anyway I told my Girlfriend about this and she made it seem like she didn't care she said has long has he do not come over with his wife and she said go head call him i do not care. So I never Call him Then the day comes and I say imma call him she flips on me Saying no I don't want you talking to him I told you this already. When prior she said to call him. She then says why aint I good enough for you to talk to ? I told her flat out You and I are not into the same shit plain and simple So I am not wasting time to talk to you about hings you do not want to hear about. Then She used the excuss he cheats on his wife. Okay I would have liked to hear that one first not the other shit but oh well. tobe continued)